| sophia bush pb - entry example |
[08 Aug 2008|12:48am] |
Growing up in Staten Island, the Holden family didn't have much to speak of in terms of finances and a house, the apartment was always a home. Bernadette and George, her parents, were deeply in love with each other, and never hesitated to show affection in front of their daughter. This environment proved itself the perfect place for an impressionable young girl to sponge up personality. Monkey see, monkey do. Having inherited such a profound fondness for being showered in love and adoration, the small girl was often found doing the same unto others. Anyone and everyone was worthy of love - and sometimes that was all they needed. Love has been and will always be what makes Laurie's world go 'round. She was conceived in this atmosphere, and it constantly surrounded her as she made the transition from awkward child to knowledgeable young lady. But with this shift comes a loss of innocence, and hers came earlier than it should've. Her father would later say that growing up wasn't a choice, but a reaction to uncontrollable circumstances. At the tender age of eight, Laurie was forced to grow up.
On April 19th, little Laurie celebrated her birthday. Her most prized gift ended up being a beautiful dark green scarf, a white 'L' stitched carefully onto one end - a treasure that's packed away with all of her fond memories. But a few weeks after that joyous occasion, Bernadette Holden fell ill. It was a reoccuring nightmare that her parents had managed to shield her from for many years, but it was a nightmare that was fully realized upon word from the doctor. There was no more they could do. Her mother's life was in God's hands now. It was a long time coming, but still there was no way to lessen the pain of the blow. It was another month before they told Laurie of her mother's illness and pending expiration. How does one go about telling their delicate eight year old that Mommy isn't going to be around much longer? They grotesquely underestimated their little girl. She could sense that something had been wrong all along. Her mother wasn't out tending to the garden on Saturday afternoons, no longer cooked their humble meals, and didn't go to work anymore. The only time she left her bed was to attend church services on Sundays, and even then her father carried her to and from the car, and up to recieve holy eucharist. It was painful to see her strong, vibrant mother reduced to this weakened state - but for her father's sake, she put on her best smile and assumed her mother's role in the house. Laurie became everything her mother was, and then some. But the one void that Bernadette Holden left that couldn't be filled by her daughter was a second income.
In the years following her mother's death, certain realities became more and more apparent. Laurie had become everything to her still-mourning father, an honest man who gave his daughter everything he possibly could. She loved her father dearly, and would even go as far as saying he was her best friend. They depended on one another, especially when times got difficult. George worked two jobs and barely got time to sit for dinner at a normal time. But when he arrived home under the cover of night, his meal would be in the microwave waiting. With this stressful schedule, George didn't have much time to monitor his growing daughter. He was too busy scrimping and saving for a college education - something that he and Bernadette had missed out on - to involve himself deeply in her business. She was fine on her own, already instilled in her were the morals he had hoped she'd fully embrace. It wasn't that he didn't care, quite the contrary. He wanted to give his baby what he didn't have: a future. But feeding her desire to learn and her stomach at the same time became an impossible task for one man to do alone on pitiful salaries combined from various professions. He couldn't support the both of them and be the parent he knew she wanted and deserved. The living conditions they had been forced to endure due to financial constraints weren't suitable for a young girl. She never complained, though. If anything, she was the one sketching landscapes and using the pictures to cover chipping paint in the living room, or the crack above the toilet. It was at this point in time that her father decided he needed to do what was best for his child, not what made him happiest. He called up his distant mother in Seattle and arranged to have Laurie move in.
So she did as her father asked her. She had trusted his judgement up until that point, and he had never given her reason to do otherwise. Midway through her Junior year the sixteen year old began calling 'the rainy city' her home. She attended Rainier View, a prestigious high school in the upper-middle class portion of Seattle, and met her Grandmother for the first time. She found herself falling into a niche with other overachievers, and was given the opprotunity to bond outside of schoolwork thanks to extracurriculars that she had never had the time to get involved with before. Her classes always came first because she needed that scholarship, but she was now able to earn spectacular grades and pursue outside interests at the same time. An active participant in softball, swimming, and dance club, she was getting to be more social and confident in everything she did. She made friends, learned a lot, and met new challenges with her mother's vivacious passion and her own newfound boldness. Most importantly, it was at Rainier View that she discovered three things that would be an integral part of the rest of her existence: her political aspirations, high sense of pride, and Brian. Well, at least these were three things she thought would be important for the rest of her life.
Brian was the class clown all throughout high school. Charming, cute, with the ability to make anyone laugh in any situation at all. Laurie had developed a crush on him rather quickly, and he responded exactly the way she had hoped when it came to light. They started dating almost immediately and stayed together until the summer before college. He was a very important figure in her life because she experienced a lot in the amount of time they were together. Her first boyfriend, her first love, her first intimate experience. He may not have been the brightest crayon in the box, but he was sweet and caring, and that's what mattered to her. Unfortunately he was set to play basketball at Gonzaga, whereas she was headed to Barnard College back in New York the following year. The idea of being on the opposite coast as him was absolutely devastating. She didn't want to be anywhere without him, because she had become so accustomed to him sneaking through her window at night, his body pressed against hers as they fell asleep in rebellious triumph. They were young and in love, completely blissful until the moment they said goodbye and she boarded that airplane. Distance was supposed to make the heart grow fonder, but that wasn't so in the case of these two. They had highly underestimated the strain the distance would put on their relationship, and he ended up calling her in tears - confessing that he had been unfaithful. Worse, he had slept with a girl that Laurie had been close with during high school.
From that point forward, Laurie became somewhat jaded when it came to love. She was unwilling to open herself up to anyone who wanted a relationship, and typically kept things on a friendship level. Her senior year of college she got intimately acquainted with a guy that had been her friend for years, but was disappointed when he told her that he was only interested in non-commitmental relationships for the time being. It was only years later when she stumbled upon Alex Krycek that she learned how to trust again. She was fresh out of college and met him haphazardly while he was on patrol - a cop at that point in time. She was always a sucker for a guy in uniform, so she agreed to a date. And then another. And another. Eventually things got serious and she moved in with him, the whole ordeal resulting in three good years of her life completely wasted on a guy who was too involved with his work to care about his girlfriend. She knew that he liked to play hardball before they got together, but he never acted like a jerk with her - that was part of the appeal. He made her feel special by treating her better than she'd ever seen him treat anyone else. Unfortunately, when the fighting began, she slowly saw him begin to morph back into that person she saw him be with other people. The asshole. He broke up with her, basically to get it over with because they both knew what was coming. Still, she's unable to forgive him for so cruelly cutting her out of his life without notice nor reason.
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